Hello loves <3
So, how have you been? I know that in my last post, which you can read here, I wrote that my next post would be all about Troye's new music, but this morning was quite eventful and I wanted to talk to you guys about it.
My second post on this blog, posted on November 26, 2014 (ONE YEAR BLOG ANNIVERSARY COMING UP!) , was titled 'When You Feel Overwhelmed'. I wrote it because I was at a time in my life where I felt like a lot of things weren't going my way. Not school, not my friends, sometimes not even my family. Over the last year or two, this feeling has been becoming more frequent.
In my post about being overwhelmed, I had written about how a lot of my stress stems from school. This year I entered high school, and it has been an awesome experience so far. But there is a part that's quite frustrating and stressful, and that part has been finding it's way over to me these past couple weeks.
The past several nights have involved me staying up late, much later than is needed for me to get an appropriate amount of sleep. I used to LOVE homework and getting all my assignments done neat and perfect. Granted, I do still find it thrilling to have finished an aesthetically pleasing paper or project and admire what I've accomplished, but as years have gone by I find that doing work is more a chore than something I enjoy.
Some of you might think I'm insane for saying I enjoy homework, but everyone's different. Of course, I love writing more than anything. Although, it doesn't help that English has not proved to be my favorite period this year. There's just something about the different styles of teaching between my teacher in 8th grade and my current teacher that hasn't made me fall in love with writing in school as much I did last year. Hopefully that will change.
Anyway, instead of continuing on with this ramble I wanted to ramble about something else - smooth transition ;)
Everyone stresses.
Everyone has their own problems - those might be physical, emotional, social, whatever.
Everyone has their own ways of dealing with those problems.
This morning I had finished my Cheerios and gone out to my driveway to wait for my ride to school. She was running late, and so I was waiting out there for a bit. It hit me suddenly that I had forgotten my health notebook on my desk. My health teacher is really strict about notebooks - we need to have them every class. So, me being me (the crazy worry machine), I start freaking out. I threw down (well, more like gently placed because it's quite heavy) my backpack and rushed to the door. Just my luck - it's LOCKED. So, again, me being me, I start tearing up. What am I going to do? I'm going to get a zero in health. I'm going to fail. I can't wake my parents and my sisters up. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO???
I masked my emotion, like I always do, and hid my face under my frizzy hair. I didn't want my friends to see the absolute weirdo I was being. I texted my parents telling them I had a rough morning and that I forgot some stuff and it seemed like everything was crashing down around me. I got to school all discombobulated and couldn't help but to fear the worst possible situation. Of course, we didn't really need our notebooks that day, LOL. But thankfully, I had an absolutely amazing friend with me the entire time. She noticed that I was "down in the dumps", you could say, and was so supportive and loyal. She offered me a hug and such kind words. I really, REALLY, appreciate that. SO much she'll never know.
Anyway, I wanted to put that little spiel in here because it just shows you that sometimes we stress over nothing. We work ourselves up over things that easily don't matter. Take the time to breathe and just re-group, and go about your day.
We all have our own stories. Our own demons inside. Our own worries and stressors. For me, those come from school, my appearance, and relationships with friends. Honestly, I didn't think I'd admit things like that a couple months ago. But I've changed. I've become more comfortable with myself, developed new relationships, and am starting to build a future for myself. But how am I supposed to build that future if I'm here worrying about not getting 100% on a neurotransmitters quiz?
I'm a big believer of the phrase/idea: Don't dwell on the past or plan for the future, live in the moment. Yes, that kind of contradicts my previous statement about building a future, but that's just general; just thinking about possibilities and fantasizing about going to college and becoming a well-known writer. But anyway, I believe it's important to focus on the present, the NOW. It's kind of hard to do that when all of these thoughts and worries get in my head and in my way. You feel me?
I started meditating just recently; I'll let you know how it goes. Maybe it will really make a change and improve my temper or something. But I want to make a change. Stop draining all of my energy over stupid, little worry bugs. In a previous post I compared insecurities to pests that you should just flick off. Well, I'm gonna do the same with stress. JUST FLICK IT RIGHT OFF. Let it bounce off of you. You have a built-in shield around you that doesn't let anything get in your way. Granted, that shield might be dented or even cracked sometimes, but you should always mend it back up and keep your feet planted on the ground, ready to move past anything that's causing you to feel as though everything is crashing down around you.
If any of you can relate or even just need to talk, I'm always here! E-mail me anytime! harelrziv@gmail.com
Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon.
*computer hug*
So, how have you been? I know that in my last post, which you can read here, I wrote that my next post would be all about Troye's new music, but this morning was quite eventful and I wanted to talk to you guys about it.
My second post on this blog, posted on November 26, 2014 (ONE YEAR BLOG ANNIVERSARY COMING UP!) , was titled 'When You Feel Overwhelmed'. I wrote it because I was at a time in my life where I felt like a lot of things weren't going my way. Not school, not my friends, sometimes not even my family. Over the last year or two, this feeling has been becoming more frequent.
In my post about being overwhelmed, I had written about how a lot of my stress stems from school. This year I entered high school, and it has been an awesome experience so far. But there is a part that's quite frustrating and stressful, and that part has been finding it's way over to me these past couple weeks.
The past several nights have involved me staying up late, much later than is needed for me to get an appropriate amount of sleep. I used to LOVE homework and getting all my assignments done neat and perfect. Granted, I do still find it thrilling to have finished an aesthetically pleasing paper or project and admire what I've accomplished, but as years have gone by I find that doing work is more a chore than something I enjoy.
Some of you might think I'm insane for saying I enjoy homework, but everyone's different. Of course, I love writing more than anything. Although, it doesn't help that English has not proved to be my favorite period this year. There's just something about the different styles of teaching between my teacher in 8th grade and my current teacher that hasn't made me fall in love with writing in school as much I did last year. Hopefully that will change.
Anyway, instead of continuing on with this ramble I wanted to ramble about something else - smooth transition ;)
Everyone stresses.
Everyone has their own problems - those might be physical, emotional, social, whatever.
Everyone has their own ways of dealing with those problems.
This morning I had finished my Cheerios and gone out to my driveway to wait for my ride to school. She was running late, and so I was waiting out there for a bit. It hit me suddenly that I had forgotten my health notebook on my desk. My health teacher is really strict about notebooks - we need to have them every class. So, me being me (the crazy worry machine), I start freaking out. I threw down (well, more like gently placed because it's quite heavy) my backpack and rushed to the door. Just my luck - it's LOCKED. So, again, me being me, I start tearing up. What am I going to do? I'm going to get a zero in health. I'm going to fail. I can't wake my parents and my sisters up. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO???
I masked my emotion, like I always do, and hid my face under my frizzy hair. I didn't want my friends to see the absolute weirdo I was being. I texted my parents telling them I had a rough morning and that I forgot some stuff and it seemed like everything was crashing down around me. I got to school all discombobulated and couldn't help but to fear the worst possible situation. Of course, we didn't really need our notebooks that day, LOL. But thankfully, I had an absolutely amazing friend with me the entire time. She noticed that I was "down in the dumps", you could say, and was so supportive and loyal. She offered me a hug and such kind words. I really, REALLY, appreciate that. SO much she'll never know.
Anyway, I wanted to put that little spiel in here because it just shows you that sometimes we stress over nothing. We work ourselves up over things that easily don't matter. Take the time to breathe and just re-group, and go about your day.
We all have our own stories. Our own demons inside. Our own worries and stressors. For me, those come from school, my appearance, and relationships with friends. Honestly, I didn't think I'd admit things like that a couple months ago. But I've changed. I've become more comfortable with myself, developed new relationships, and am starting to build a future for myself. But how am I supposed to build that future if I'm here worrying about not getting 100% on a neurotransmitters quiz?
I'm a big believer of the phrase/idea: Don't dwell on the past or plan for the future, live in the moment. Yes, that kind of contradicts my previous statement about building a future, but that's just general; just thinking about possibilities and fantasizing about going to college and becoming a well-known writer. But anyway, I believe it's important to focus on the present, the NOW. It's kind of hard to do that when all of these thoughts and worries get in my head and in my way. You feel me?
I started meditating just recently; I'll let you know how it goes. Maybe it will really make a change and improve my temper or something. But I want to make a change. Stop draining all of my energy over stupid, little worry bugs. In a previous post I compared insecurities to pests that you should just flick off. Well, I'm gonna do the same with stress. JUST FLICK IT RIGHT OFF. Let it bounce off of you. You have a built-in shield around you that doesn't let anything get in your way. Granted, that shield might be dented or even cracked sometimes, but you should always mend it back up and keep your feet planted on the ground, ready to move past anything that's causing you to feel as though everything is crashing down around you.
If any of you can relate or even just need to talk, I'm always here! E-mail me anytime! harelrziv@gmail.com
Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon.
*computer hug*
Really nice post, and so relatable. I heard that saying too, and true with flicking off the bugs. Hole all goes well, and good of your friend for understanding your worry. Take care.
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