One Year of Blogging!

Hello, love <3

     Today, one year ago, I posted my first blog post to this blog. 

     I titled it Writing simply because that is what I love to do. I added the header "just me expressing through a keyboard" simply because that was my goal. And it fills me with such joy to say I have been doing so for one year. 

     Thank you so much to you, a reader. Just by reading the thoughts I present in these posts you make me happy. 

     Thank you for reading, for commenting, for supporting! As today is Thanksgiving here in America, I would like to say how grateful I am to have this platform where I can write down what I feel with out judgement or fear. I am so grateful for this blog and all the positive impacts it has had on my life. 

(To all those who celebrate, Happy Thanksgiving!)

     I will continue to come to this blog when there's something I need to say but I can't seem to find the words to say it out loud. I will continue to write about things I love and am passionate about. And I hope you will continue to join me on this journey. 

     I feel as though I have become a happier person in general through posting over the last 365 days. I feel as though this blog has allowed me to find and expand my passion for writing. 

     Here's to many more years of "expressing through a keyboard."

     Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon. 

*computer hug*

Accepting Failure

Hello, love <3

     It brings me such joy to be able to say, the holiday season is approaching! Last year, I took part in "Blogmas" - posting a blog post every day in December and I am totally going to do it this year as well! If you'd like to read Blogmas from last year, my first post is linked here.

     I will be in New York & Israel (EEP!) over winter break, so I'll have tons of amazing pictures and moments to share! We are spending two days in New York and twelve in Israel which is beyond exciting. What are your plans for break?

     Speaking of holidays, Thanksgiving is in FIVE days! Meaning, my one year blog-iversary is also in FIVE days!! I created this blog when I was very conflicted and confused and didn't really know how to get my thoughts out of my head. One year later and I don't know if writing would be such a big part of my life if it wasn't for this blog.

     I remember writing my first post and picking out my background and font type. But I'll save all that for when I post my One Year Anniversary post :)

***

     Last Sunday I had decided to let go and have fun instead of worrying so much about the studying and assignments I had to do. I spent the day out with my mom; we went to the mall. It was really fun just to spend time together and momentarily forget what was due the next day, you know?

     Then, I got home and sat down to work. I felt as though I had no time to complete what I needed to complete, when in reality it was only about 4:30 in the afternoon. Still, I panicked. I started memorizing my vocabulary words and became really overwhelmed with the amount of work I had to do. Right at the point where I nearly started crying, one of my mom's best friends, whom I talk to on a weekly basis (she "coaches" me and shows me ways to relax and understand the world in a different way) texted me asking if I wanted to talk. If that's not an amazing coincidence I don't know what is.

     So I called her and we ended up not talking about what she had originally planned because I explained to her what I was upset about. Our conversation that day revolved around failure. She brought up a really honest point: in simple terms, you live and you learn.

     You need to fail in order to get better.

     You need to fail in order for you to realize that you need to keep going.

     She had me write a sentence down, a sentence I had to create myself to remind myself of what we had talked about: I take on challenges and know that they are what make me stronger. I'm ready to fail.

     That test I had to study for and that paper I had to plan out were still important things on my mind, but after our chat I took it easy. I took a step back and said, you are going to finish this. You are going to put your best effort forward and the outcome will be what ever it will be.

     A few days later, some of my friends were texting on our group message and were saying how overwhelmed they are and how they won't be able to finish this and that. I told them this:

     "I know we have all had it really tough recently, and I just want y'all to know that, even if you don't believe it, everything will be okay & everything will work itself out. I know homework may not be the only thing you're worried about, but keep in mind, it's just high school. We'll be out of here soon and exploring the world..."

     There was quite a bit more but my point is, focusing on how much you have to do won't get you anywhere. If you know you are not going to finish, accept it. It won't be the end of the world. Granted, if it's something really important, put 100% effort and do what you can. 

     You need to fail in order to get better.

     The word failure might scare some people. To be completely honest, it scares me a little bit. But I know that I have to fail in order to see that it's not the end of the world, but I do need to persevere.

     Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon.

*computer hug*

Strolling Down YouTube Memory Lane

Hello, love <3

     I've realized that I haven't really talked much about YouTube on my blog, apart from my Playlist Live posts (which you can find here, here, here, and here!). But as I was contemplating what to write about, I stared up at my shelf full of books written by the content creators I watch on the screen of my laptop or phone everyday, and decided that's what I'll write about.

     I have been watching YouTube for more than 2 years now, and over that time period I have become part of a family. A family made up of people who don't really know that I exist (lol), but I love them nonetheless.

     I turn to YouTube when I'm happy, when I'm sad, when I'm angry, nervous, excited, bored, procrastinating, content: any time, really. There's always new content to watch, but then again, there's also tons of old content that makes me smile any time I go back to it.

     Some of my favorite videos of all time are:

Dan and Phil react to Teens React to Dan and Phil

Baking Lemon Drizzle Cake With Zoella! | Tanya Burr

If Websites Were People... (Part 1)

Waxing My Legs With Zoella

Singing With Helium (ALL OF THEM)

ALL of Joe's Los Angeles Vlogs

Tyler Gets His Hand Stuck In Elevator (Brighton Vlog)

Surprise Signing & Frickle Frackling | Playlist 2014 Day 3

Cute Boy Spotting ft. Blessing

What I Eat in a Day (Niomi Smart) (ALL OF THEM)

Baking a Lemon Meringue (This one is extra special, because when I met Jim I talked to him about it)

The Ultimate Pancake Battle

Guess the YouTuber

Tell Me Why

What Popular Songs Really Mean (especially #2)

The Annoying Challenge

How Well Do We Know Each Other?

     Those are just a few of the thousands upon thousands of videos that have made me happy and smile and laugh. Who are your favorite YouTubers?

     There is something about this platform that brings me so much joy and warmth. What would I do with out these people? I am so immensely proud of each and every one of them. Here's to every thumbs up, every milestone, every person who has ever clicked that "subscribe" button on this platform. We're all one giant YouTube family.

     Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon.

*computer hug*

Disappointment or Fate?

Hello, love <3

     Monday evening I tried out for my high school's Swim Team. Try outs were supposed to be both Monday and Tuesday night, but for some reason the coaches changed the plan and told us after we finished swimming that the team would be announced that same night.

     So after swimming my hardest and fastest, I went back home and sat by my phone, checking my email every 5 seconds so I wouldn't miss the message with the team roster. When that moment finally did come, I discovered that I didn't make the team.

     Yes, I had a good cry and yes I was upset. I'd worked my hardest, harder than I ever had before.

     But, it wasn't for nothing. Just because I didn't make the team doesn't mean I'm going to throw everything away. I am going to continue swimming and I'm not going to dwell on the fact that I'm not a part of the team this year. Because of the conditioning workouts I slowly became more and more proud of myself.

     A big part of trying out for the swim team was college. I'm in my first year of high school, but I don't think it's too early to start thinking about college. Of course, I do say I like to live in the now, but college is a huge part of my academic career. So, I began thinking about how I'm going to get in.

     It worried me. I'm not an athletic person. I went into swimming this year with a mindset that if I don't make the team, I'm not going to go to college because I'm just another person with good grades.

     That mindset slowly began to shift. As I was going to these workouts every day after school, I was forming a family with all of these other people. I was having fun and felt as though I were a part of something. College completely slipped my mind during those times.

     After discovering that I didn't make the team, I took a step back to reflect:

     Sports is not my thing.

     But I do have so many other qualities that I know a school perfect for me is going to value one day. Writing this I'm kind of surprising myself. I'm in the 9th grade. College is far, far away. Then again, it'll probably be here in the blink of an eye.

     I also talked to my parents about not making the cut. They know I want to pursue my writing somehow in the future. And they also know that I worked my butt off this month trying to get fit, improve, prove myself to the coach and in the end, myself as well.

     My mom reassured me that not making the team my freshman year isn't going to get in the way of the things I have planned out for the future. She also told me there is a reason behind every decision and event.

     There's a reason I didn't make the team. I don't know what that reason is. Whether it was because of my amateur swimming technique, or something more latent. Something that I might never find out about. Maybe something bad would've happened if I made the team. Then again, maybe not. But I've learned to accept the fate that is mine instead of dwelling on it and being disappointed.

     Next time something unfavorable happens in your life, reflect not on how what happened didn't unfold as you had hoped, but rather how what happened, happened. It was meant to be that way. You may not be able to change it, but you can accept it.

     Thank you for reading and I'll talk to you soon.

*computer hug*